Have you ever felt called to do something different, but were too scared to go forward with it because “it might not work out”?
Well, one night, about 15 years ago, I went for dinner with my dad at a pub near my apartment. My hands were shaking when I arrived, because I was so scared to tell him what I was about to do.
It was this: I had just quit my job as a senior editor at a national business magazine to backpack alone through Asia for seven months.
To make things more interesting, I had been diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder that came with a pile of health problems, the weirdest of which was a severe sun allergy.
So, yeah, the thought “this might not work out” was definitely on the table.
In fact, my friends had suggested that going on this trip would be “the biggest mistake of my life”. I was throwing my career in the toilet and would probably end up a bag lady on the streets of Toronto.
I had no reason to believe my dad, who was a critical, hard-driving workaholic throughout my childhood, would say anything different.
I decided to get it over with: blurting out my plan to travel overland through seven countries from Thailand to Nepal.
There was a long silence as he sat there, nodding, thinking deeply about something. I did my best to look calm and confident, even though I felt like my chest was being crushed.
He sipped his beer, leaned back and sighed. And then he said the nicest, most wonderful thing:
“Shawn, there’s no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. All those years I worked so hard without stopping to enjoy any of it, because I believed the reward would be waiting for me at the end. Now I understand. The rainbow IS the gold. So if this is something you really want to do, go do it and enjoy it.”
So I went. And because I went, I learned how to meditate and observe my own thoughts, and that was the biggest game changer in my life. I also learned that it’s safe to reach out to people, and to let people in—and that made my life a lot more enjoyable.
For example, in Lhasa I posted a note in a hostel saying that I needed to get to the Nepal border. This led to a series of spectacular adventures with two Tibetans, a German, an American and another Canadian that culminated with a sleepless night of unstoppable giggling near Everest base camp. It was so ridiculous and wonderful I’ll never forget it.
And, guess what? My career was not destroyed, as my friends had predicted. Because I had expanded as a human being, new and more satisfying doorways of opportunity showed up for me.
I published my first book—a series of short stories of my experiences and what they taught me about “how to be happy“, which included learning to become aware of, and responsible for, my own thought patterns and beliefs.
I ran a magazine, then became a college teacher, then a workshop facilitator, then an agency copywriter. And then I finally embraced my lifelong secret gift…and began helping people receive guidance from their own soul, as a medium. And that would never have happened without the thousands of hours I spent doing meditation. Which would never have happened without the trip to Asia. You see how it unfolds?
I’m not writing this to convince you to quit your job and go on a backpacking trip.
I’m writing this to convince you to walk toward that thing your heart most wants to do—it’s unique to each person and it changes over time.
For me, my big journey now is building a business that helps people experience more joy and success as themselves. Like the trip to Asia, it’s not always easy, but it’s helping me grow, and I’m working with people I love who love me back. That is a revelation! I’m still working out my fears about being seen and heard (lifelong social anxiety, so putting my True Self out there like this, week after week, is effing HARD) but that’s all part of the journey.
So what does your heart want? Maybe it’s building a life and business where you fully show up as your Self (I can help with that!). Or maybe you dream of living on a boat (as a good friend of mine does, in a marina near downtown Toronto), or building a tinyhouse on a cute piece of land, or taking up painting, or going back to school for something you’ve always wanted to learn, or moving to another country, or sharing your poetry publicly at an open-mike pub night, or…?
The gold of life is what you experience on any journey between Point A and Point B. It’s about how that journey helps you grow and expand as a human being, which allows you to enjoy and contribute to life in new ways. Whether or not you ever arrive at Point B is irrelevant. You probably will, eventually, so long as you keep going. But that is NOT the gold, and believing that it is totally screws us up.
Because if we don’t make an effort to enjoy this moment, we’ve thrown away the real gold.
As someone who has gone on quite a few of these epic journeys now to make big dreams come true (like that time I started a charity and ended up raising thousands of dollars to build schools and toilets in Laos and India), I can assure you that as soon as you arrive, you may feel a day or two of bliss, but that will quickly transform into “Now what?”
So look deep inside yourself and ask your heart what it most wants to do. Then do it. And enjoy it. Not because you’re necessarily going to be great at it, or become famous, or make a million dollars doing it. But because: This. Is. Your. Life.
There is no pot of gold waiting for you at the end of the rainbow. The rainbow IS the gold.
So build a life that’s aligned with who you really are and enjoy it, so that, later, you won’t look back with regret, like my father.
(That said: it’s never too late to start! My dad, now in his 70s, is making the most of the time he’s got left. My parents grew up in small-town Manitoba where they knew everyone. So after years of living in the cold big-city suburbs, they picked up and moved to a smaller, friendlier city where they know all their neighbours, and participate in endless church bazaars, just like they did as kids. They LOVE it.)
Whether you’re doing stuff you don’t love, or stuff you do, the years are going to go by anyway. You might as well do something fun with them.
Share the cool stuff you’re doing (or intend to do, now that you’ve read this!) in the comments below or on my Facebook page.
Rise up and shine as your True Self,
Shawn xo
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Soooo I just drew a rainbow (for fun). HI SYNCHRONICITY!! :-)
Yay for rainbows…and synchronicity!!!! :) xoxo
Yay for synchronicity…and rainbows!!!!!!! (p.s. I responded to this comment days ago but it didn’t show up for some reason. Weird!) luvs ya!
What an awesome, inspiring and well written article! I intend to be a bit less future-oriented and enjoy the today a bit more.
Thanks so much Andreja! That means a lot coming from you! You’re my inspiration for living in the moment haha! xo
Thank you Andreja! You are one of my greatest inspirations for enjoying each day with the way you so fully live your life! xo.