I am here. Here I am. That’s what my therapist used to get me to say at the end of every session. Yes, I’ve been in therapy. Anyone serious about living their purpose should consider it, because we all have some baggage we’d be better off without. The real “good life” is about travelling light. Besides, if I hadn’t been someone who desperately needed therapy, I never would have been motivated to go off on a quest to figure out how to make my life actually work. And I never would have discovered the “Life Purpose Roadmap”, and all the other amazing things that have transformed my life, and my clients’ lives.
Mastering something, anything, takes focus and effort that requires some form of motivation. Life is smart—it knows the most powerful motivation is suffering…that really kicks our butts into gear. But suffering is not the point of life, you see. It’s just the loving motivator to move us in the direction of growth and expansion, which is where real happiness lives.
But wait. Go back and imagine what I described for a minute. Life actually working. Close your eyes and picture that. It’s important, because if you can’t imagine something, you can’t have it. I do it all the time. More and more, what I picture actually happens. This is the first key step in being the author of your own Life Story.
The whole point of my quest used to be nothing short of enlightenment. Seriously. I was reading the works of the Buddha and Krishnamurti, and I thought the goal of life was annihilation of self. I used to meditate for 5 hours a day. One of the most wonderful days of my life was when I discovered, while deep in meditation, that annihilation is not the goal; there is no goal. (Anyway, it’s not possible to “pursue” enlightenment, only self understanding.)
If there is a goal of life, it is to BE Life. Aliveness. Happiness. Being here for every. single. moment.
It’s living your life purpose and being you at your highest potential, just because. Not because some higher power expects you to, or because your mother told you to—but because life is way more fun that way.
You are the main character of your life, yes, but you are also the author of your Life Story.
I know it’s hard to believe that, but I’m going to provide as much evidence and support as I can, because it’s going to change everything for you. Yes, you are born into certain circumstances but, just like the author of a novel, you still have a lot of options within those circumstances.
The Rules of Life
If you think of LIFE as a person (which many do, and call God), he/she has no preferences about what kind of life you should live, what emotions you should feel, what you should do or experience. Hard to believe in our guilt-ridden, judgment-plagued world, but to the best of my inner research, it’s true. There are no set rules about who you should be or what you should do or experience. There are, however, definitely rules that govern how things operate—and that’s what I want to share with you. For anything to exist it has to have certain rules—think of Monopoly, for example. It has rules that make the game possible, but there is no judgment in those rules. They just exist, kind of like gravity. Without gravity, we’d be in a whole different game, right?
So…what happens when someone plays Monopoly for the first time with people who’ve mastered the rules? They usually lose. Same with life. You need to understand and master the rules like a professional, so you can break them like an artist. The game is just the construct within which you are having an experience. Hope I haven’t lost you. But, really, I think it’s time you knew this.
The Two Levels of This Game: “Life”
“How You Work” and “How Life Works”
Many people have some understanding of one and very little of the other. That’s why you have spiritual gurus who are seemingly enlightened yet they abuse their power and sleep with their followers. They understand “How Life Works” but not “How They Work”. Then there are the people who understand how they work (psychotherapists, for example), but they’re missing the bigger picture. Once you understand both, you can really enjoy this game. You can write a story for yourself that will leave you smiling well into your 90s–the kind of smile that will make you the envy of the nursing home.
I met an 85-year-old woman in a Starbucks (drinking an espresso, no less) who had that smile; it gave me something to strive for.
What I’m Not
Let’s be clear. I’m not a guru. I’m not enlightened. I’m no Byron Katie or Eckhart Tolle. What I have to offer is a lot of research and real-life experience, which I navigate with my “superpower” of emotional intuition (my secret weapon when helping clients uncover their “Life Purpose Roadmap”). I have a degree in journalism, which adds an understanding of story narratives and great research skills. And I have a degree in hard knocks as well—I’ve been to hell and back again in my own life, and in a spiritual sense as well via a kundalini awakening and over a decade of meditation. I still don’t know everything, but what I do know has so drastically changed my life for the better that I’m betting it’s accurate enough. I want to share it with you, because I feel like that’s my life purpose. I believe everyone has a right to “feel alive” and excited about life.
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