As Rumi wrote: “If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?”
But, honestly, and no offence meant to Rumi, I think it’s human to feel irritated by this process. Let’s be real. It’s not fun being sanded, shaped and polished. It’s not fun facing all our fears and pain and parts of us we don’t yet know how to meet with love.
Maybe some of you will relate to the story I’m about to share. Sometimes, when you get too comfortable, too set in your ways, the Universe turns your life upside down and inside out as a gift, to shake you up and help you remember who you really ARE.
I think of my body as a fun vehicle I’ve been given to experience my life with. I imagine myself as a Kia Soul, unique and quirky but practical and useful, a little slow to get up to speed but dependable once I get going. And I remember from when I had my own (actual) car that if I don’t change the oil, get it rustproofed, wash it and take loving care of it, the car begins dragging and breaking down. It gets old before its time. It can support me only as long as I support it.
The real confusion around self love is that people think it’s a noun, but it’s actually a verb.
It’s something you actively choose to do. Every day.
Notice how you feel during the moments when you are doing the things I’ve listed below. I’ll bet you feel good. That’s what self love feels like. Worth pursuing, no?
Self love (and, by extension, self trust) is hard.
It’s hard to talk about, because we’ve been taught that it’s either airy fairy or it’s selfish.
It’s hard to do, because our culture barely talks about or openly practices it, so we don’t even know what it looks or feels like.
