I’ve been thinking a lot lately…about how we’re all walking around struggling with secret wars inside ourselves. We work so hard to end these wars, not wanting anyone else to know about them. We judge ourselves for not knowing how to end them.
It’s exhausting.
We see our human self as something in our way, a problem to be solved. We try everything to fix it, change it, outrun it.
But that just makes it all worse.
We try to force those parts of ourselves we don’t like to change. We try to shame and judge them into changing, or argue them out of existence.
We go to war with these parts of ourselves — or, worse, we dismiss them entirely. We just pretend they aren’t there.
But they are there. And they fight back.
They don’t like being dismissed. They don’t like being judged. And when they fight back, you’ve got a bigger problem than you started with.
That’s why, sometimes the more “work” you do on yourself, the worse things get — because those parts of you are essentially saying: “F*ck you.”
But when you actually listen — when you meet those parts with empathy, show up as a caring witness, stop trying to force them to see things differently…
They calm down. They relax. They chill out.
What Happens When You Feel Calm Inside
When those angry, confused, scared, frustrated parts of you finally feel calm, something incredible happens.
Your higher self takes over.
I call it your Higher-Self Intelligence, or HI. Some people call it their “gut intuition” “inner voice” or “soul”. You can call it whatever feels right for you, but putting it in the driver’s seat of your life is the only way to live your higher potential.
When that part of you is in charge, it starts showing you solutions you never saw before. It introduces you to people you never knew. It takes you places you’ve never been. It opens doors you personally could never have accessed on your own.
We want that part of ourselves leading the way. Not our human.
The irony is that the only way to experience that is by helping your human feel what I call the “Holy Trinity of Inner Work”: safe, loved and enough.
To achieve that we need to care deeply about our human’s feelings, desires, and needs — those needs and desires actually reflect our soul’s journey. They matter.
We have to learn how to provide what our human is looking for from the inside — because if we keep chasing it on the outside, we’ll spend our whole lives running after things that will never truly fulfill us.
We are all dopamine addicts. We think getting more of what we crave is the answer and solution to our emptiness.
When we stop chasing and start being, that’s when we become truly powerful. We can show up and contribute our best to this world from a place of love and calm.
I only know because I’m a fellow addict, just like you, chasing achievement, validation, connection, meaning, and distraction.
I’ve had lots of spiritual experiences. but Im not enlightened.
I don’t have all the answers. I never will. And honestly, I’m suspicious of anyone who thinks they do.
But I have learned some things — through my own struggles, my own confusion, my own very human moments of feeling completely lost — that I think are worth sharing. Because they’ve made my life genuinely easier. And I want that for you too.
You Can’t Change What You’re Identified With
My work with myself and my clients is all built on a method that helps you step outside of your current identity.
I know my method doesn’t solve everything. It’s not an instant fix.
But I do know it helps solve a problem that almost all of us are struggling with — and that problem is this: we cannot change what we are identified with.
We are identified with our current emotions, our struggles, our beliefs, our perceived shortcomings. We are them, as far as our mind is concerned. And so, if we don’t have a tool to step outside of those things, we have no way to change them. We simply won’t be able to.
The only way we can change something is by being able to see it from a higher perspective. And to do that, you need a tool that gives you that perspective.
That’s what my method does.
You Don’t Have to Call It Spiritual
We don’t need to frame this as a spiritual thing, even though, honestly, everything is.
Everything on Earth is an aspect of spirit having an individuated experience. We are all the One Thing, experiencing itself in different forms. I don’t claim to know everything about that. I have experienced it, and I know there is truth in it. But I don’t identity as a “spiritual person” or hang out in spiritual communities. In fact, I actively avoid them.
The Problem With “Spiritual People”
Many people who claim to be spiritual, enlightened and all-knowing are completely caught in their human’s desire to feel special, important, and above others. That makes them unsafe to follow.
Further, anyone who has had a genuine spiritual experience — myself included — has to be very, very careful, every single day, not to grab onto those experiences as a badge of superiority.
Humans are very easily seduced by their own bullshit. Our world is full of fallen gurus that prove this.
I’ve had a lot of spiritual experiences and also personal experiences where I’ve seen that we can literally reshape our own reality. But the most important thing I’ve seen is that we all have that source of wisdom inside us. We are all gurus co-creating our world together.
The most valuable thing I can do is teach you to find that guru inside yourself and trust it over everyone, including me.
It is not my place to tell anyone how things are or aren’t. I’m only here to share what I’ve experienced and what I’ve learned — in case it makes someone’s journey a little less painful and a little more fun.
What I’m Really Here For
I know exactly what it’s like to get caught up in the stories in your mind and suffer deeply because of it. I’ve been there. I spent decades finding my way out. I learned a few things that work. And now I just want to help free people from unnecessary suffering.
Here’s something I know: there is suffering on Earth that we cannot avoid.
People you love will leave or die. There will be storms, there will be conflicts, there will be scarcity, there will be challenges with family and strangers and entire countries — things we did not choose and cannot control, because they were created by other people’s choices in this shared game of Life. We are all affected by each other’s choices. That’s what a shared game means.
Some suffering is simply part of being here.
The secret is not to add to that. Not to pile on extra, unnecessary suffering with our own thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors. And not to unconsciously create suffering for others because we’re unaware of our own patterns — the cravings and desires quietly controlling how we show up.
That’s what my work is really about. Developing that awareness.
The Most Beautiful Thing We Can Do
I believe I’m here to teach people to go deeper — to look at themselves from above, from outside their current identity. Not to dissociate, but to actually get more connected to their humanity. To have more empathy for their own human. To understand how genuinely hard it is to be human, and give that empathy to themselves.
Because that’s what we came here to do.
We didn’t come here to be spiritual — we already are that. We came here to have a temporary experience of being human. To share that experience together.
And so the most beautiful thing we can do is embrace our shared humanity with more kindness, more understanding, and more empathy for how very hard this game of Life is for all of us. That begins with having genuine empathy for ourselves.
From that place, we can create something so much better. A more loving, peaceful, win-win game.
For all of us.
